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Friday, April 3, 2009

Words of Wisdom....

1.Do not walk behind me, for I may not
lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do
not walk beside me either Just pretty much leave me the
hell alone.

2 .It's always darkest before dawn. So if
you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper,
that's the time to do it.

3.Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be
replaced, you can't be promoted.

4.Always remember that you're unique.. Just
like everyone else.

5.Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

6.If you think nobody cares if you're alive,
try missing a couple of car payments.

7.Before you criticize someone, you should walk a
mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them,
you're a mile away and you have their shoes

8.If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is
probably not for you.

9. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach
him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer
all day.

10. If you lend someone $20 and never see that
person again, it was probably a wise investment.

11 If you tell the truth, you don't have
to remember anything.

12.Some days you're the bug; some days
you're the windshield.

13.Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

14.The quickest way to double your money is to
fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

16.There are two theories to arguing with women.
Neither one works.

17. Generally speaking, you aren't learning
much when your lips are moving.

18. Experience is something you don't get
until just after you need it.

19.Never miss a good chance to shut up.

20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping
pill and a laxative on the same night.

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